Thursday, September 6, 2012

Frequently Asked Questions About My Sessions

The following are some common topics, concerns, and frequently asked questions (FAQ) that people have about working in a session. Below I've offered some insights to better prepare you for connecting with me as a spiritual teacher. Hopefully, you've already read this blog about "How to Work with a Spiritual Teacher" as well as the services I offer in my "About Me" section. If not, please check it out after reading this FAQ.

What Does a One-On-One Session Entail?
The session is a fluid and intuitive connection, where we talk, meditate, or do whatever else needs to happen. It totally depends on what you need and what I have to offer in that moment. Relaxation and focused breathing are central tools to a session, but where things go from there is entirely a spontaneous arising in that moment.

As I mention again later on this post, there's an energy connection that happens when we're together regardless of if we are in the same place. That energy is a teaching. It's like a tuning fork to help you find your own harmony. Additionally, we talk about whatever needs to be talked about. This, too, is important, but I may answer questions or I may not. Generally speaking, I'm operating out of my intuitive guidance about what to share and how to teach. You can bring questions that you may have, but oftentimes, they become less important once the session starts and the ego lets go of its incessant need to fill itself with information as a form of safety.

In general, I ask you to trust the process. It's not trusting me so much as what we're joining together to create in the moment. It can be intensely healing, and it can also help you to jumpstart your own growth or potentially a spiritual awakening (Although that should NEVER be expected. Awakening comes when your soul is ready. No one can force that process, nor should they try).

At times, you may feel very comfortable or very uncomfortable. I will often bring your attention to your discomfort so that our focused awareness can bring up what is upset. That's part of how healing works. This can be very gentle, or it can be very intense depending on the issue. You will need to learn how to dedicate yourself to this type of work in between sessions to truly embrace your spiritual path.

Deep healing can also occur, and after an intense session, it becomes critical that you maintain a practice and take care of yourself to rid yourself of any of the internal toxins that have been released during the sessions. You may even get sick for a few days as things clear, but the key becomes how you feel after the clearing. Typically, releasing anything that toxic can make you feel immensely better.

What May I Feel in a Session?
Obviously, everyone feels differently in these one-on-one sessions, and I would point you towards my "Testimonials" post for thoughts from past and current students.

Because the energy of the session can be intense, many people initially feel uncomfortable. The discomfort can range widely, although increased body heat and sweating seems to be fairly common. As we combine our attention to a particular source of discomfort, things often move. This may increase the discomfort, but when an issue or blockage releases, there tends to be the movement of several feelings and sensations as things come out. Often the student comes to rest in a sense of expansiveness and relaxation after a big release. At which point, these sessions often feel very comfortable, connected, and loving (loving in the more pleasurable sense, but ultimately, the whole session is an expression of love).

How Long Is a Session?
Typically, the session is 1 hour.

What timeslots do you have available?
My sessions are held at 9 am, 11 am, 1 pm, 4 pm, and occasionally 6 pm Pacific Standard Time.

How Does the Session Take Place?
For most people, I do my sessions via Skype, which is free for computer-to-computer phone calling. For those with webcams, we can have video chats. For people who are local to wherever I happen to be living, I hold in-person sessions for long-term students only. In some cases, I also set up email exchanges as well.

For more about email exchanges, you can read my FAQ about Email Exchanges on this link.

For Skype Sessions, Does It Matter Where I Am?
Generally speaking, it's important to be in safe space where you feel like you can be open and vulnerable. Vulnerability is our greatest strength, but it's not one that most of us know how to be with. Additionally, having a session with me while you're at work or in a cafe with WiFi probably isn't the most conducive place to going into to deep sacred places.

What Will I Get From a One-On-One Session?
This is a problematic question because it comes from the ego. The ego always wants to get something. On the broadest level, you are embracing your freedom, but that often involves a lot of letting go. So at times, you may feel like you're losing stuff, not "getting" anything, per se. Consequently, working with me is going to require a new mindset where you aren't focused on what you'll get, achieve, fix, or improve. Instead, it's a focus on how to simply be you. We work together to find all the old habits, patterns, and blockages that you have within you. Then I may suggest different tools to help you develop in your own practice to let go of those issues.

At all times, there is an energy connection between myself and a student, and that is always providing a mutual teaching to us both in our journeys. A lot of amazing stuff happens on that level that neither of us may ever fully mentally be able to comprehend because energy is much greater than any idea that we can create in our minds.

For those in awakening specifically, the energy connection can be the most important because the newly awakened individual often has trouble holding their new vibration. It's kinda like they're running water, but running water is going everywhere. In this way, I am a being who shows how to hold an awakened vibration, and I also offer tips and techniques to help with this as well.

How Often Do You Do Sessions With a Student?
For those who are making a long-term commitment with me, I typically work on a biweekly basis with a student, i.e. every two weeks.

Do You Work With People Who Aren't Ready to Make Long-Term Commitments?
Absolutely. I do single sessions with people all the time. However, I encourage people to always see the spiritual path as a long-term commitment, not necessarily to me or any specific teacher, but to themselves.

How Much Does it Cost?
I work by a suggested donation, and my suggested donation is $150 USD/hour session for those with financial means. For everyone else, it's whatever you can offer within your financial means. Lack of funds is not an issue; I don't believe in denying my spiritual services because of money. I accept  donations through PayPal.

When Should I Donate?
Please only donate AFTER we have agreed upon a day and time for our session. DO NOT donate money for a session before discussing whether we are working together and before we have finalized a time to meet.

Once we have finalized a time to meet, then you can donate any time before the session.

Shouldn't Spirituality Services Be Free?
My answer to this is that spiritual teachers have always had some kind of reciprocity and support from their communities. In other times, food, clothing, and shelter was all provided. Tithing and donations have long been a custom to support spiritual teachers, and hence, I've created a flexible system that also honors that the way Western Society offers most of its reciprocity is through money.

For more on the topic of money and spirituality, please check out this blog: "Mindful Money Use and Reciprocity"

Do You Ever Not Work With Someone Who Wants a Session?
Yes. I simply follow my inner knowing. If I am guided to not work with someone, then I don't. I can't say why this may happen, but on this path, we all learn that there is so much we can't know. I have to trust my inner knowing because there's no way I can intellectually ever have all the information in the universe to know how things may or may not work out with someone. It may simply be that a person isn't ready on the soul-level even though their ego thinks they are ready for a teacher. It can be a lot of things.

What's Your Refund Policy?
All ebooks sales and session donations are final. However, I am happy to entertain requests for refunds and most likely would provide a refund when kindly requested for one. By and large, I am not interested in money as much as helping other people. The refund policy is part of setting an appropriate boundary for those who may be upset that they didn't get what they thought they needed from a session or an ebook. Oftentimes the most important lessons we do receive on our spiritual paths are the uncomfortable ones anyway. So for the sake of general policy, I don't do refunds.

Can I Reach Out to You if I Have a Spiritual Emergency?
Occasionally, I hear the term spiritual emergency, but more often than not, it is simply the ego having a big tantrum. I won't say that it is fun, but I do encourage you to keep breathing and relaxing into whatever is coming up. I can schedule sessions on short notice for those of my regular students, but I am otherwise not set up for this kind of impromptu work. Instead, I would simply point you back to the importance of building your local spiritual community to support you when things get challenging.


Other Important Topics for Working with a Spiritual Teacher

Preparing for a Session

Generally speaking, all you need to do is to relax and be yourself. If meditation and other practices beforehand help you center and ground, I recommend that you do them. I do advise against adding in mind-altering drugs or substances. Many people believe that drugs like marijuana make them "more spiritual," but instead, they add another layer of illusion on top everything else. A body clean of substances is the most open and receptive vessel to the deeper spiritual truths that are within you.

For more thoughts on how to prepare, please read this blog post from my students:


Getting Angry With the Teacher and Falling in Love With the Teacher

This topic is actually two sides of the same coin. In one aspect, the teacher is hitting on a story the student doesn't like. In the other aspect, the teacher is connecting with a story that the student does like. In these instances, it is important to remember that the student is actually projecting themselves on the teacher. In the instance of being angry, they're projecting their upset feelings onto the teacher. In the other, they're projecting their love onto the teacher.

Additionally, as a teacher, there is only one way to truly teach...with love. Because so many people don't understand love, the first time they connect deeply with me they may confuse wanting a sexual-romantic relationship with the feeling they are experiencing. Consequently, a lot of work is around helping the heart to mature and the mind to open up to different forms of love. This deep love with a teacher is actually a gift because it's helping the student to tune into the vastness of his or her own love.

For more about this sacred relationship, you can read this blog post:

The Spiritual Teacher and Spiritual Student Relationship

Post-Session Self-Care

After a session, things may move internally. That can mean lots of stirred up emotions. It can feel really good for awhile, or it may get really messy and confusing for awhile. It's important in especially the 2 to 3 days after a session to be really mindful of your self-care (meditation, journaling, breathwork, yoga, or whatever you are doing for yourself). Not being mindful can break the momentum of the inner work that you are doing, and it can simply make life even more uncomfortable.

As I often remind people, things are likely to get messier before they get clearer in this process.

Becoming My Friend

Because of the deep connections that often arise in this work, one off-shoot is that people try to categorize me as a friend, a soul brother, or some other term. The nature of this work is in part to help you understand the nature of deep connection within you, and when someone feels deeply connected in a session with me, I encourage them to see that as simply discovering how much love they already have within themselves. It should be used as a basis for sharing that depth with others and sharing love appropriately in your life.

It is rare that any students become friends of mine, and I have my personal preferences as to whom I add to my personal spiritual community. As such, this work should be considered to be strictly as a student and teacher relationship, and any attempts to fit me into other parts of your life no matter how well meaning are unlikely to be shared by me.

Self-Sabotaging the Work

Because self-sabotage is so common in this work, I wrote a whole blog just about this topic. It truly is important to learn how to go into difficult moments, especially in sessions with me. By leaning into discomfort, many students have released big issues and come into deeper levels of love and spaciousness than they've ever known before.

For more on self-sabotage, you can read this:

Sabotaging the Healing Process and Running When It Gets Tough


You may also want to read:

5 Signs You're Ready to Work With a Spiritual Teacher

Spiritual Tests from a Spiritual Teacher

Contact me about an hour one-on-one session
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